In the simplest definition humility can be defined as the quality or state of not thinking you are better than other people, that is the state of being humble in its simplest definition in English.
Humility is a good thing, as a matter of fact everyone who wants to become someone in life has to have a healthy dose of humility.
Humility should be our in born nature, and we should learn to treat others the same way we want them to treat us.
However, our society in Africa has used humility to kill a lot of creativity in us.
Right from when a child is small, many parents pander to the society and tradition by clipping the wings of their children rather than allowing those same children learn how to use same wings to soar.
A child is quickly told off in order not to seem proud or different from others.
Their daring spirit which could lead to the release of loads of creativity and talents are chopped off right from a tender age so they do not appear proud and arrogant in the eyes of people.
They are rather taught humility in order to appear good, acceptable and humble in the eyes of the world. They are taught how to down play themselves in order to please the world.
Learnt humility becomes their way of life till adulthood, until they go into a different and advanced society and their humility becomes a limitation.
I know someone during my MBA days in the United Kingdom who was consistently nagged because his supervisor was irritated by his humility.
She consistently told him that he does not need this kind of humility or modesty to progress in life, and that it is undermining his work and presentation, but my Nigerian brother was so used to being humble that his creativity was not fully unlocked at that time, he was not able to sell his work well to his supervisor in order not to appear proud and his supervisor saw through it.
He told me then that he didn’t want to “over hype himself”
Our society also worsens the situation.
People want to make you pander to them.
They make you feel like you are the problem and that you are full of arrogance and pride, whereas they are the narcissists.
They are the proud and arrogant ones who feels threatened by you because you make them uncomfortable.
Have you ever taken your time to study the people who accuse others of lacking in humility?
You would be surprised at the amount of pride and arrogance that lies in them.
They want to put you in a box, and if you do not fit into that box you would be accused of lacking in humility.
The question you should ask yourself is that if they were that humble how come they are quick to be offended and accuse people of lacking in humility?
A truly humble person, whose humility comes from the heart is not quick to notice a lack of humility in others.
You would have displayed your arrogance and pride to another level and to the world before they pay attention to your lack of humility.
Make no mistake, there is an African definition of humility, and there is an English definition of humility.
The African definition is a narcissist, it seeks to kill your creativity,
it seeks to take away your voice,
it seeks to create doubt in you and make you unsure of who you are and your ideas,
it seeks to clip your wings and does not ever want those wings to flap not to talk of soar.
It seeks to manipulate and control you, don’t pander to these kind of humility.
Rather embrace the English definition which is defined
“AS NOT SEEING YOURSELF AS BETTER THAN OTHERS”.
That is a definition of equality and that I believe is what true humility is.
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